☞ It's been a while. I'm feeling a bit better now, but the last weeks were rough. My depression was really bad, I had the first full-on panic attack in years and my phobias acted up. *sigh* I'm still not entirely back to my normal medium depressed state. I didn't get much writing done and there are still 05:04:47 left. No idea how much I'll write today and tomorrow.

☞ I actually did work on my Merlin fic for the first time in months. I realised it sucked and that it needs a major rework. ( Spoilers for recent episodes )

☞ I think I finally found out why disaster films don't work for me. It's not the wildly improbable natural catastrophes, because those aren't necessarily improbable at all, it's the wildly improbable ways in which humans conquer nature and stop the catastrophes. More often than not by using a lot of explosives. I would like them if they showed humans surviving the catastrophe, I wouldn't mind if they showed humans fighting to survive and dying (The Day After Tomorrow I liked, despite the unrealistic premise). I do mind the age old "conquering the wilderness" trope that crops up again and again. It's not only inacurate, it also reminds me of how humans treat their environment in other situations.

☞ Yuletide: I really hope my recipient will like my story, since I haven't written for the fandom before and couldn't research as much as I would have liked to. It also won't be as long and will end rather abruptly. But I'm confident because we seem to like similar stories and share a few quirks, despite not having any non-Yuletide fandoms in common. Now I only have to find a competent beta and brit-picker who knows the fandom. Or someone who can tell me if the story works once I've typed it up, at least. (Why yes, I still use pen and paper for writing.)

I should be doing so many things. There are stories to beta, assignments to write and stories to work on. And naturally, I have this idea for a new story. A Merlin fic, and I have no idea how it ends. I started writing anyway, but since it's in English I doubt I'll ever finish it. *sigh*