It's often impossible to 'read the room'. Even people who state they want concrit can react badly to it--there's no way you can just guess what they would welcome.
It makes it more difficult for those of us for whom the writing process is dialogic*, as this type of things helps to make fandom more hostile to real conversation, instead making it about the form. You can only say x, y and z, or then you're just making the author feel bad. And if you misjudge the type of thing that author wants to hear, then you're the rude one, who should've known.
The only safe thing to say is 'I love this story' or a small variation thereof. There's really no other thing you can comment on without taking the risk of pissing someone off. And really, sometimes, I'm up for the challenge--I made various good friends by commenting on their stories in a true way (i.e., not mechanically repeating what one is supposed to repeat), but sometimes, I just don't have what it takes to deal with it in case it goes wrong.
*I totally get that this is not so for other authors. However, stating you don't want x type of comments (or comments in general) can really go a long way, instead of expecting a random person to read your mind.
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carisma_sensei
no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 01:03 am (UTC)It makes it more difficult for those of us for whom the writing process is dialogic*, as this type of things helps to make fandom more hostile to real conversation, instead making it about the form. You can only say x, y and z, or then you're just making the author feel bad. And if you misjudge the type of thing that author wants to hear, then you're the rude one, who should've known.
The only safe thing to say is 'I love this story' or a small variation thereof. There's really no other thing you can comment on without taking the risk of pissing someone off. And really, sometimes, I'm up for the challenge--I made various good friends by commenting on their stories in a true way (i.e., not mechanically repeating what one is supposed to repeat), but sometimes, I just don't have what it takes to deal with it in case it goes wrong.
*I totally get that this is not so for other authors. However, stating you don't want x type of comments (or comments in general) can really go a long way, instead of expecting a random person to read your mind.