rodo's journal

You get writer’s block, that’s what – at least for me. I got assigned a great request for Fandom 5K! That’s the good news. I absolutely adore it. Of course, that means I want to do the request justice, so right now I’m dithering over actually getting down to, you know, working on it. Because there’s always that little part of me that’s afraid I’ll mess up big time whenever a request is that good.

So, yeah, I’m falling into what we Germans call Fluchtfleiß (escape + industriousness), doing just about anything else I’ve been wanting to do for months, except working on the story. I’ve still got a month left, so it can’t be too bad, right? Right?

(Of course, that’s presupposing public transport won’t completely wipe me out, since my train gets cancelled until the end of June, starting next Wednesday, and the ones before that starting at the end of May, leaving me with a two hour bus ride instead of half an hour by train as my only option. One way.)

Okay, I'm beginning to think this exchange summer is seriously cursed for me. It started when I had to choose between everywoman and an exchange that sounded far more relevant to me that was being proposed on fail_fandomanon. There was a prospective mod, and they had a writing period in mind that would have overlapped with everywoman, and since I only do one exchange at a time, I decided to chance it and bet on the latter. Which, of course, never happened at all. Yay.

But okay, I said to myself. Shit happens. There's still fandomgiftbox. It's been run well for years, I've participated three times as a writer and twice as a recipient. I always had fun. I'll just throw myself into that one. Yeah, if it were on schedule, it would reveal on September 5th, otherwise known as next Sunday. It never really reveals on time, but this year, the question is whether it'll reveal at all. The mod has vanished off the face of the earth, leaving everything in limbo, which of course means I didn't get to write much for it either. The uncertainty certainly put a damper on my creativity - and due to my rare fandoms, my chances of getting a gift are pretty slim.

So, I thought. There's the great autumn exchanges coming up. I won't sign up for shipoween and trickortreatex, but I've pinch hit for the latter before and I could always write treats! I want to write something for people, feel the excitement of being part of an event! And now that's happening. I don't even know what "that" is, but it feels kind of like a follow-up to the multifandomdrabble meltdown, although don't ask my why I get that feeling. I honestly don't know. Both of those happening so close together, maybe. And the shoddy modding.

I just wish exchanges were a bit more robust, I guess. Better modding, people communicating their decisions well in advance and listening to the community, exchanges not relying on one person doing everything.

I don't want to jinx it, but at least there's always Yuletide. Although with my current luck, who knows?